Published On: Thu, Dec 27th, 2018

10 Signs You Are In Love With Your Enemy

Anger and love are both such passionate emotions. Alex Wise, a marriage and relationship expert from Loveawake dating site explains “it’s easy to find yourself in the surprising predicament of falling in love with the person you once thought you hated”. We ask Alex what are the major signs that what you’re feeling is closer to desire than disgust. Here they come

  1. You Can’t Stop Talking About Them – Over dinner or at a party with friends, you’re dominating the conversation, and every single word is about your “enemy.” When the subject changes, you can’t help but bring it back around to your new favorite subject. If you can’t squelch the urge to make everything about them, you might be edging into dangerous territory.
  2. They’re All You Think About – Your house is a wreck and your inbox is full, because all you can think about is this person that you hate. You’re consumed by thoughts of your enemy that there’s no room for anything else in your head. Obsessing at this level is usually an indicator of attraction, whether you’re ready to admit it or not.
  3. You Feel The Urge to Look Your Best – Sure, a snappy comeback has more of a bite when it comes from someone who’s dressed to impress. Still, if you’ve added time to your morning routine or funds to your clothing budget, you’re probably more concerned with the “impressing” part than the “snappy comeback.”
  4. You Analyze Every Conversation – Remember when you went on that first date with a new person, and you spent the next day picking apart every sentence? If you’re treating every conversation like an opportunity for psychoanalysis, then you’re worrying about what they’re thinking far more than you would if they were someone you didn’t care about.
  5. A Pounding Heart and Sweaty Palms – That rush of adrenaline that you feel when your enemy approaches can cause your pulse to race and your palms to sweat, but so can the release of dopamine and norepinephrine; the chemicals that your brain is flooded with when you’re in the presence of someone you’re attracted to.
  6. You’ve Become a Cyber-Stalker – If your daily routine consists of Googling every variation of your enemy’s name and creeping their Facebook page, you’re in big trouble. The desire to gather dirt on someone you don’t like is fairly short-lived; you find something juicy and then you move on. When you can’t ask someone for details about themselves because you’re supposed to hate them, you’re not able to satisfy that “I want to know everything about you” urge through conversation. Instead, you’rehittingthesearchenginelikeanaddict.
  7. You Read Every Email At Least Three Times – Emails and texts from your enemy are usually read once and then discarded. Holding on to them and pondering the placement of every punctuation mark definitely points to attraction, not acrimony.
  8. Every Encounter is Carefully Planned – Spending your commute strategically planning every interaction and scripting any possible exchanges might be a sign that you’re more invested in this person’s opinion of you than you’re aware of.
  9. Concentrating is Impossible – Asking the people around you to repeat themselves or having to read the same paper twice to make sense of it is a sign that you’re preoccupied; if the object of this preoccupation is the opposition, it’s a sure sign of burgeoning attraction.
  10. Your Friends Make Fun of You – Friends usually know what’s going on in your head long before you do. If they’re starting to make jokes about your “crush” or giving you a hard time because you’re focusing so much of your energy on an attraction dressed in a conflict’s clothing, they might be onto something.

Coming to terms with a romantic interest in someone that you don’t get along with can be difficult, but it can lead to a spirited relationship if you can both learn to keep your temper. If you get the feeling that your affections are returned, it might be a good idea to bury the hatchet and see where the passion between you leads.

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